We spend a lot of time counting things.

We all count the candles on the cake, yet some people pack more living into each year than others. We count our height and weight. We’re either too short, too tall, too skinny or too fat.

We count the sizes on our clothes and the numbers on the scale, but these figures can’t measure the size of someone’s heart or the depth of their soul.

We count down the days on the calendar leading up to important events, but it’s the experiences themselves that we treasure. We count the seconds, minutes and hours of each day, but what happens within those moments is what makes life worth living.

We count one’s level of education and admire it, though a diploma doesn’t guarantee that person carries themselves with dignity.

We count the size of our paychecks, but that doesn’t measure one’s worth. We count the balance in our bank account, yet you can’t buy happiness – or love.

We count the miles traveled, yet being at home is true comfort. We count the items on our bucket list, then put off until tomorrow what we can do today.

We count the balls and strikes and the wins and losses, but it’s the clutch performances under pressure that we revere.

I could go on and on, but you get the point.

What my mom taught me many, many years ago is to pay attention and count what really matters in life. She often repeated to me the words of Albert Einstein, who famously said, “Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts.”

I’ve learned what counts is being there for others in their darkest hours. What counts is showing up every day for your family and for your job. That’s accountability.

What counts is picking up the phone and listening when a family member or friend is in need.

What counts is who shows up for your birthday, but not whether they brought a gift.

When the chips are down, you’ll know what counts most.

I was facing a surgery and my ride cancelled on me at the last minute.

I had no family in the area to help, so I called in a favor to my friend Ted. He knew I wouldn’t have even asked unless I was out of options, and before I could finish my sentence he said, “I’ll be there. I’ll figure it out, but I’ll be there.”

He didn’t have to check at work to see if he could take the day off, he just said, “Don’t worry. I’ll be there.” It wasn’t an easy ask either. It was an early Monday morning surgery and he needed to drive me to and from the hospital for the outpatient procedure.

He had to get me to the hospital by 5:30 am as I was first on the schedule. That’s early, but what made things tougher was that I was a good 40 minute drive from the hospital and the drive from his place to my place was another 45 minutes in the opposite direction. He literally lived in another state. So he got up in the middle of the night, drove to my place, picked me up and then took me to the hospital. He waited several hours and then drove me home. Once I was out of surgery everything was a blur with the drugs they gave me, but somehow I woke up at home. He even ran to the pharmacy to get my post-surgery medication.

Ted is a good egg. He’s like a brother to me, but he still went above and beyond and did it without hesitation. He put aside his own hectic schedule to help me. For that I’m grateful.

Moments in life like this are what counts. Not how many friends you can collect on a social network, but how many true friends have your back in a time of need.

Helping friends or family when it’s not convenient for you is what really matters. Next time someone asks you for a favor, even if your schedule is full, say yes. Your effort will mean more to them than you know. They’ll remember you can be counted on.